I was reading a book
on how to win your partner back.
It doesn't give you A to Z instructions
on what you should or shouldn't do.
Because everyone is different.
What works on you,
might not work for another.
A relationship is like a house.
If the foundation of the house is not strong,
the house will collapse in a matter of time.
You and your partner are
like the main structures of the house.
And your relationship with your partner
is built on these structures.
Imagine the main structures of the house
are not strong or stable.
Imagine there are big cracks
all over the main structures.
Imagine one structure is not strong or stable,
and dependent on the other.
Can you build a strong house?
How to have strong and stable structure,
and not over reliant on the other?
That’s to work on self.
Meaning, self worth and self love.
Meaning, know who you are.
Meaning, know what you want.
When you rely on your partner
to make you feel worthy,
When you rely on your partner
to make you feel love,
your partner will be drained one day
and the relationship will collapse,
just like the house.
When both of you have self worth,
when both of you have self love,
you have a strong foundation
for the relationship to be to built on,
just like the house.
In every good relationship,
the partners should help each other to grow,
and not pull each other down.
It should be two strong structures
whereby the house is build upon.
It shouldn’t be a structure
that’s not strong and stable
and using the other
to build the house upon.
Or worse still,
both structures are not strong
and a house is build upon.
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About Me
- Princess B
- Just a very random person with very random thoughts and random behaviours.
5 comments:
you clearly explain the situation very well ya
so if the person's so stubborn as in still not developing his self worth & love then how? house alr collapse alr la..
Prophet Mohammad once said, "Two people in a successful marriage, is like the two main pillars of the Great Temple, holding up the great roof. They have to work together, and yet be slightly apart."
All nice and good. But I wonder if it is humanly possible.
I've never seen a couple where the balance of power in a relationship is split 50-50.
One will always love the other more. My ideal would be 51-49, man loving his woman a little more, not less.
At the most productive part of my career, I could wholly focus on work because my ex-wife provided a stable and predictable domestic foundation for me to come home to.
She called it emotional dependence. I don't think so, because I realised there is about a million women in this world who will gladly take her place.
Maybe I have too much self love and self worth!!!
Guess we all play different roles in a marriage, whereby we attempt to come together and see if we complement each other.
I think balance of power, here, is not meant to be balanced at all.
I would love my man to take charge and take over. But you better convince me you are good enough first.
But I believe the question here is, when you are stripped of your assets, your family is non-existent, friends are basically a myth and you dun believe in God, do you still have anything left in you to move on and build up your life again from there?
Do you make these people and things an intergrated part of your life? Or do you simply make them your entire life's existence?
Happiness is a state of mind, Mackie you said that to me many years ago. Eating your favourite char kway teow makes you a very happy man.
When two self-sufficient individuals come together, chances are so much higher that they could make it work. (If you ask me, dun work also nair mind, thank you for participating try again next time)
Because one could go out for their favourite char kway teow and a few beers in the kopitiam after a big fight, not the self-destructive route that left so many ugly silver scars on my pretty slender wrist.
Just a rather abstract analogy.
*Tuesdays blues*
*yawns*
I think a levelled balance of power in a relationship is hard to achieve. One will always be a non stop taker and the other the endless giver. I rather be single forever than be in a lopsided relationship.
I do not want my woman to let me take charge of everything either. I want an equal partnership and not a slave.
If I were to lose everything and everyone tomorrow, I doubt it is natural to be estatically happy, at most mellow and stoictical.
Humans are social animals. We can be single and happy but we always know deep down that we can be happier.
I think living for no one but yourself is the worst prison a person can be confined into.
A little known statistic to Singaporeans, but Singapore has the highest rate of elderly suicide in the world. I guess we forgot to tell these elderly to move on and build up life again :-)
No, our elderly found no more hope in living cause gahment say cannot smoke in kopitiam anymore come July and they couldn't master line dancing.
Hiak hiak hiak..
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